I get high on medical conferences-without malice towards none at all

I get high on medical conferences. I am from the medical profession specialising in the field of dermatology. Dermatology is a profession which thrives on conferences– one conference fades into another– like our country which is perpetually on election mode– Dermatology is perpetually on a conference mode– each patting their back– about how successful their conference was. Our annual conferences were a grand affair–knowledge, food, entertainment, venue– a heady cocktail of the best of the best– always looked forward to– planning started much in advance. And every year post conference we came back bloated – with food , entertainment and a little knowledge which lasted till the next conference, The initial days Got introduced to medical conferences soon after doing my PG–initially I was very serious in approaching a conference– would be in the venue on time– and would be the last person to leave the hall– take notes– and collate them once back to the room- plan the next day's speakers. The first day – CME day– was a one hall affair- so nothing much running about to do. You collect your coffee – and get mesmerised– by the amount of knowledge overflowing in the hall. One of the earlier conferences which I have vivid memories was the international conference at Ashoka Hotel– new Delhi– those were the halcyon days–speakers were too good so was the ambience and the entertainment - was wide eyed at the lavish spread of food - i became a diehard fan of conferences - Amjad ali khan-i remember that while tuning up his Sarod got irritated and rebuked the waiters who were putting up and clanking plates for dinner at the background– and then he rendered his recital to perfection. Then it dawned on me, as I gained experience attending conferences, that there was a recurring pattern: the same speaker discussing the same topic, just changing the locations and shuffling through slides. Sometimes they seemed disoriented, as evidenced by their first slide on the presentation where they had forgotten to update the venue information. There was no original research being presented; the so-called "new" ideas were simply rehashed versions of what had already been published in Western literature. It took me some time to realise that national conferences served a different purpose: they were primarily for socialising, networking, and making connections. If you wanted to gain knowledge, you were better off exploring other avenues. Conferences were more about indulging in the excitement and extravagance, rather than focusing on intellectual growth. The presentation and the presenters Speakers with substance borrowed from Western literature I remained deeply intrigued by specific speakers, particularly those who recounted their firsthand accounts of utilising innovative drugs or techniques within their own practices. These individuals adeptly merged elements from Western literature and practices with Indian sensibilities, imparting a wealth of knowledge upon me. Their curious minds constantly sought out fresh ideas, and it was through introspection that I grasped the multitude of possibilities lying beneath the mere words on a page – numerous avenues for interpreting and creatively implementing pharmaceuticals or refining surgical procedures. Ultimately, my attention zeroed in on these exceptional speakers, allowing me to gain invaluable insights that greatly influenced my daily professional endeavours. Speakers with impressive slides– san content Some speakers concentrated more on putting some funny caricature on their slides– the caricatures really were very well thought about –hoped their scientific content was also as well thought about as their funny caricatures as it took the attention away from the main content. The Originals and experts Some speakers who took the podium were an expert in that field striving to bring knowledge from the lab table to the bedside– they spoke with authority quoting from their own experience– no frill slides– in fact the slides were simple black and white Mostly they were foreign speakers as i realised that from whatever esteemed institutions from India one may be– not an iota of original research has transcended from lab to bedside, all the research funds always gets diverted towards frivolous expenditure in the bargain the department gets a new machine or a new research paper to publish which is of hardly any use- i realise when most of our speakers were -self acclaimed, self proclaimed and very few were self made. The PG level speakers Then there were a set of speakers- who copied verbatim from books–unaware that the audience they were talking to were not PG students– some faltered on the slides– you could make out it was made by his residents. The topical experts Then over the years people became so called topical experts- they caught hold of one topic- mainly on which they had written their thesis- and expanded and proliferated like the East Indian company– on the opium trade– not a morsel of original research or ideas. Sister societies evolved into topical societies–and once the international journals and papers became available at the touch of a finger– the halo of knowledge began to fade . Pay to Play The worst speakers were the ones who had conflict of interest- they had sold their soul to the pharma industry which did not have any conscience.Pharma industry was profit driven– they always had their pound of flesh– at the expense of patients. The holy grail of Hippocrates' oath had turned 180 degrees to the hypocrite's oath– courtesy the pharma industry– as soon as they put up their first slide–you knew that he had been sponsored. The mentors Some speakers had the zeal of mentorship in them. The way they used to teach the newbies whenever they put up a query to them was a pleasure to watch– they explained it so lucidly in the corridors of conferences or wherever you could accost them– they never needed a podium - i always stood at the fringe and listened to them But some were so good- that you did not mind if they exceeded their time.Few speakers had rehearsed their presentation to perfection. Speak or perish became the motto for some – it had some kind of narcissism attached to it. The audience: They are of different characters, of different motives, and come with different agendas. The serious ones There was a group of doctors– hats of to their dedications and zeal for knowledge, they were always sitting in the front rows oblivious of everything– drinking in every word of the speaker -taking notes– and at the end of day their conference bags were full of knowledge and not from the curios from the exhibition area–but this lot is now becoming an endangered species. The politicians The audience– some came to politicise- you be sure that this guy is standing for some organisational posts– when someone whom you have never met– suddenly tries to be friendly– or you start getting unsolicited messages on your WAP from unsaved numbers . E voting– was one of the best things to happen– suddenly in a WAP group a chap who has been a perpetual lurker -suddenly starts everyday Good morning wishes– putting irrelevant comments of appreciation to become visible– – you know election time has come–and after elections suddenly – they vanish again– some to lick their wounds – some to enjoy the fruits of labour– for lifetime, some do perform– exceptionally well. The Thailla -semias Then there is another group of audience– who hardly enter the halls– they are more interested in freebies and collecting gift tokens from the exhibition stalls. At the end of the day they are duck walking laden with bags– you have to separate the bags- to find as to whether you are addressing the right chap . The merrymakers Then there is a group of participants–they come on the first day to register and last day to collect the CME certificates-then off sightseeing with the family– conference is a big break for them from their busy private practice– of late a good step has been taken where the accompanying person is not allowed inside the hall. The elusive GBM Once out of inquisitiveness i tried to attend the so called GBM- where important decision about the administrative function was taken– i was surprised as to why people fought to become the host city– was it for prestige, was it for augmenting the profession or there was more to it that meets the eyes– well it was better to leave a sleeping dog lie. I was impressed by the doctors who sat in the GBM when wonderful lectures were simultaneously taking place in the halls– always wondered if they must have attained Nirvana in Dermatology. Quiz The best part of the conference was the National quiz– it was a real enriching experience and was a sight as we saw the young PG students spar off wonderfully crafted questions by the quizmasters. Half of the questions – the veterans had no clue – but we sat grim faced as if we knew everything– like an impression given by a clueless examiner when he does not know the answer given by the student is right or wrong but sagely nods his head. The questions were wonderfully curated and the quizmasters were a pleasure to watch – the way they smoothly conducted them– some of them could give the professional quizmasters a run for the money. The orations I have never attended international lectures– but I found the orations in our conferences– just a Linkedin profile of the speaker– with his or her achievements– during the oration time- other halls came to a standstill – it was the best time to go to the poster presentation area. The exhibition area Initially i was enamoured by the freebies doled out by the pharma companies, as i wanted to impress my spouse when i get back- used to collect the junk– even the flyers– and read them— in fact we had to collect two sets of each freebies– one for our respective consultant– carry the double load throughout the day, i just left going to the exhibition centre-as i saw through the marketing gimmick of the pharma chaps. Only the bags – served their purpose– now with app based marketing the bags are now a passe. Galderma bag– the most coveted souvenir– it was so much in demand that people use to line up like a new product launch in an Apple i store– they even punched out your id card– so that you do not come back for a second one– i still wonder what was so enticing about the bag– that people got attracted to. Now the pharma companies have become more stringent on their freebies after the new rules have kicked in– as a result the footfall has dropped significantly in the exhibition areas. Chairpersons The chairpersons–some where too good- short crisp, sticking to time some were so obnoxious– that if the speaker had 20 min– they would gobble up 10 min - some taking time to introduce themselves– and if you are from a govt institution– the easiest way to get reimbursement, at the same time without the pain of presenting –participating as a chairman was the easiest way– you even got a plaque. Shift in Focus The fascination for the topics changed–especially among the youngsters–it shifted from clinical to cosmetic surgery, not even cold steel surgery– dermatology took a turn it became industry driven– the idea was if you had spent crores for getting your PG seat– it was time to reap it back with vengeance . Clinical dermatology was dying because it was not paying- only a gratitude from a patient would not fill your stomach – except for a few fossilised stalwarts who religiously attended clinical lectures– sat in the first few seats– always took notes– and it was a pleasure seeing their appetite for knowledge. Now anything to do with cosmetic dermatology like lasers, fillers, peels – will have the hall bursting at its seams–as we enter the race to pump up the wealthy and beautify the healthy. Attended a few workshops and found the doctor as dysmorphic as the patient– a perfect normal smile – convincing the patient that it is crooked, perfectly normal wrinkles– counselling for hours to wipe it out– the patient lying still for hours to get their new crop of hair– but that is where the mullah was– the workshops were bursting at seams. But i am hopeful dermatology like life will come full circle– clinical derm satisfies your soul while cosmetic derm your pocket. The evening banquet Evening gala dinner– is one of the talking point of the conferences– actually now sometimes the accommodation is little far away from the venue-so some guys just stay back till the whole procedure ends– and it is a sight– the drinks, the food , the dances , the entertainment by bigwigs– all flows and are in plenty– massive extravaganza– you feel you are in a Mughal court So after the first day of gala dinner– the next day - the hangover makes you late reaching the conference venue– by the second day– the spices and curry and the spirits have taken their toll– you yearn for a simple dal roti- and pray for the conference to end. And people seemed to attend a lot of parallel mini banquets at different venues– and the next day exchanging notes. The food After the first few conferences– I got the trick– migrate towards the counter with plain Dal and tawa roti– and whole fruits if it was not cut– if you wanted to survive the gastronomic onslaught of three days of day and night feasting. You were spoilt for choice– some people it was hard to preserve both the array of collected bags and the food line– you had to navigate skilfully between mounds of bags lying on the floor to reach the food counter-and there i always got confused– rotis were 10 types, dal 5 types, a salad counter, a fruit counter– laden like the feast of Mughal court– but after three conferences i honed my diet plan– it was dal and Roti from the first day. Who said – in India people die of malnutrition? Food coupons – in yesteryears– the food was on coupons– and you had to be real careful in preserving them, you could always dole out them if you did not feel like attending and especially to someone who has come with family,then came barcoding– on your delegate tag– that was better– you need not worry about your coupons getting lost . Accomodation The accommodation– being in a government job– we always scrounged in some govt mess or guest room – and was surprised to see the fresh graduates attending the conferences bragging about their 3 star accommodations , private pick up and drop vehicles– i remember one conference– the dancing went on late into the night– when i came out of the venue, as the private taxis whizzed past– i had to trudge back on foot– i always wondered about their paying capacity– but later learned that there was more to it that meets the eyes. The Poster Presentation This section was a mine house of information.But you had to dig them out– unique cases , unique presentations– very neatly made– you could spend hours in this section–especially skipping then heavy lunch. Because the next day a new set replaced the old- then came the E posters– The E posters stayed there - you could lazily browse – I always liked the poster presentation– although sometimes the panel of judges were rigged to give favours- the case presentations were really an honest effort – by the residents – and i always made it a point to read each one. The transformation Suddenly the number of conferences proliferated like the hair locks of Medusa. One main body just proliferated into a number of sister societies like a chapter in a book. Each topic became a topical society– each chapter in a book became a new society – became a SIG– and each sister society had their own sister conferences – and each conference merged into another throughout the year. It felt like walking down a lane in Gariahat– where hawkers– sell their wares– shouting that there's is better– than the others–so did the conferences COVID transformed me For me– I stopped attending conferences after COVID - it taught us you do not need such elaborate paraphernalia to gain knowledge- you need a laptop and net–you gain knowledge anytime and anywhere– it was a colossal waste of resources to attend such extravaganza. But I also realised we human beings were social animals– conference animals who were so long caged by the epidemic– just wanted physical conferences to be back with a bang. I tried to understand the itch– but could not– perhaps everyone is wired differently. To be continued__________